it doesnt matter how much hairdye, or make up i use. i see the same face. my own face haunts me and sometimes i can't sleep at night. sometimes i cry myself to sleep. i look in fashion magazines and wonder if supermodels ever cry. supermodels make me cry, i wonder if people like me make them cry because im so boring.
i look in the mirror everyday, i scrub my face as hard as i can, i weigh myself constantly, i obsessively count my calories, i stand in front of the refrigerator trying to distinguish if i actually feel hunger in my stomach, i am fat, no matter what i do i can't loose weight. im scared of my own shadow, it's too big. im scared of love, but i want it so bad. im scared of everyone i know talking about me behind my back, i live in constant fear, and pain.,, and ive gotten so used to it i almost like it.
nice to meet you, my name is lee.
