lee<333 (justwaterplease) wrote in achingxbeauty,


have you ever just looked into the mirror and started to cry, well have you? have you ever been sick of that same face staring back at you. do you cry until your head hurts. do you scream inside your head. do you sometimes just want to die

it doesnt matter how much hairdye, or make up i use. i see the same face. my own face haunts me and sometimes i can't sleep at night. sometimes i cry myself to sleep. i look in fashion magazines and wonder if supermodels ever cry. supermodels make me cry, i wonder if people like me make them cry because im so boring.

i look in the mirror everyday, i scrub my face as hard as i can, i weigh myself constantly, i obsessively count my calories, i stand in front of the refrigerator trying to distinguish if i actually feel hunger in my stomach, i am fat, no matter what i do i can't loose weight. im scared of my own shadow, it's too big. im scared of love, but i want it so bad. im scared of everyone i know talking about me behind my back, i live in constant fear, and pain.,, and ive gotten so used to it i almost like it.

nice to meet you, my name is lee.
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